Wednesday, January 20, 2010

I love stupid people, they are so entertaining!

 

So its raining, but exactly a surprise, its January and its supposed to be an El Nino year. But after almost two weeks of really gorgeous weather, in which many of our fruit trees decided that it must be Spring and that it was time to flower (we are pretty sure that it turned cold within enough time to divert disaster), its a bit of  shock to suddenly have a whole week worth of large storms rolling through.

So what does this have to do with stupid people and their entertainment value? Just wait, I’m getting to that! First a little synopsis of what its like when it rains in our arena. Lets follow the process of the rain.

I am going to assume that you (those odd,strange people out their that take pity on me and read my ramblings) already know how the water gets into the clouds and on to land, and not show just how long ago it was that I learned that by stating something completely wrong, thereby becoming one of the said stupid people.

Once the storm does make it on land, it releasing its precipitation while moving over the land. UNTIL it meets a block, such as a large mound of rock and earth, such as a mountain, such as all the mountains that surround Pescadero, such as the one that I live on. So, in case you didn’t get it, storms often get stuck over the mountains surrounding Pescadero and its environs. Our mountains can soak up quite a bit of water, but once they are at capacity, then the water runs off into creeks.

First, however, the rain seems to have a personal vendetta against me and my poor horse, as it frequently renders my pasture a complete swamp with many small rivers running through it. Add in the wind that is keeping the rain company and you have one really freaked out horse and two little drowned rats. Tromping through the relative ponds and rivers that constitute the paths leading to my pasture brings up the very good question as to why I still have horses.

Bear with me, we are getting to the stupid people part, I know your anxious.

Once the rain is done tormenting me and my poor horses, it then goes on  to the join a lot of other non-tormenting rain in the creek, by way of often displacing large sections of earth, most often depositing the earth right in the road that I like to use to get to work.

From there the rain turns the once docile and picturesque creek into a raging torrent that I would prefer to not get in the way of.

On its journey from the mountain creeks to the ocean, rain coming out of the mountains surrounding Pescadero often is dumped into Pescadero Creek. A creek that surprisingly enough passes through Pescadero (sorry, I just couldn’t help that one). This creek has a funny thing about, a long time ago the farmers in the area filled it with slit. It has something to do with the marsh that the creek runs through right after leaving town. Its a long story that I would have to ask my father for more details to fully understand. But back to the the story; said creek passes under Pescadero Creek road before heading to the marsh and then the ocean. At this particular spot the creek bed is only about two feet lower then the road itself, owing to aforementioned silt. Whenever the creek has any extra water deposited into, such as after a big storm or several, it backwashes into the adjoining field and road (it wasn’t taught very good manners). At the best of times this creates up to six inches of water that can only be passed through my driving on the left side of the road as the right side slops down and will be under twice as much water. At the worst, but just before the whole town is actually flooding, the water can be up to two feet or higher of water and can often move quite quickly despite the sandbags in place to help. This spot on the that floods is about a hundred yards long or more.

So you have the picture in your mind of what this looks like? Now let me explain that nary a year goes by that this does not happen to some degree or another. And nor does a year go by that some idiot (or several idiots) doesn’t get stuck in this water.

Now how stupid does one have to be to drive up to a flooded road, see that there is even a scale that shows how deep the water is, and that even some of the locals don’t go through but are instead all out of their cars and watching the other idiots who have tried to go through and are now stuck, and STILL DRIVE THROUGH!? And some of them even surpass the normal standards of stupidity and actually try to pass the already broken down car by going into the deeper water.

Blink.

Blink.

Really long blink.

 

Sigh. Yes, there really are people that stupid in the world and unfortunately they always happen to visit Pescadero when the road is flooding. But they do serve the purpose of entertaining the locals. I’ll freely admit that when leaving town today and coming upon the scene at the bridge I was having a lot more fun then I had in a long time! Not only were there two small subcompact cars stuck right in the middle of the water, but there was also a very expensive looking Mercedes that was out of the water and in the process of being towed. A couple of locals gleefully informed me that that the Mercedes tried to pass the other two cars. How it got out of the water I am unsure about as I do not believe even our local tow guy would be willing to drive his truck into that water to rescue a car. But that's not all! On the far side of the water, wanting to get into town were several PG&E  trucks and the school bus. If not for the stupid dinky cars the school bus would have been through in a minute and the work trucks shouldn’t have had a problem either. But alas, stupid people abound and so no one could get through even if they were capable.

I, myself would not have gone through even if it hadn’t been blocked. Despite the fact that I drive a Jeep Liberty, which has plenty of clearance and is heavy enough not to be pushed around by the current, I have been driving through there both as a driver and as a passenger for twenty years and know when to not join the stupid people! In my truck I might have dared though. I have gone through several times when I would recommend that a small car should not, but I have learned when to go through and when not too.

So as you can see, the rain and stupid people provide boundless entertainment for the Pescadero population.

Maybe we need something else to entertain us.

Or maybe we just find humor in everything in life.

 

Or maybe all the stories you hear about weird country people are true and you should stay very far away from us, since we obviously find you city people entertaining when you do something stupid. Which is pretty darn often.

 

You should come visit Pescadero, its a fun place!!

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